Aug 12, 2006

blonde on blonde


anyone in line to see jessica simpson perform at popstarz last night might have glanced at the venue's entrance, noticed a twenty-something boy being restrained on the ground by two bouncers and thought "grrl, you have to wait in line to see the show."

js made a brief appearance at the venue last night; and despite the club's crowded attendance, her appearance was announced only yesterday on the factory's website. chris asked me to join him and some other friends for night on the town and near jessica simpson.

while giving mitch a piggyback ride up the staris to the dancefloor, a security guy decided it was the right time to tell mitch to get off my back. or rather, pull mitch off my back. excuse me? i certainly understand the necessity for the big boys running the club to keep liabilities down and maintain a supersafe atmosphere. but how does yanking someone off my back while i'm on the staris manage to do that?

for the next half hour, i tried to explain that to anyone who would listen. i was passed from manager, to security, to bouncers at the door, all the while being ignored in my complaint. granted, 12:48 am isn't the best time to sound off or hop on my soap box. but all i wanted was a patient listener. but no one would listen. that's how i ended up on the curb, arguing with the bouncers, 20 feet down the curb being restrained by the bouncers, and finally throwing myself through the stalks of bamboo growing in front of the entrance as i tried to run back into the venue. i was swiftly tackled by both bouncers.

as simpson stepped into the crowd and lost herself and her song amongst the throng, my friends got word i was in trouble at the front. just as my throat was being squeezed, my arms were being twisted, cops were being called, and i was still trying my darndest just to be heard, my friends snatched me from the clutches of the bouncers, up off the ground and led me away yelling things about being my lawyer and promising to take me home. eager, onlooking paparzzi took advantage the altercation to fill time while waiting for sights of simpson.

so my friends listened to my rants, and my irritible anger was quickly assuaged. i didn't get to see the blonde bombshell sing her tunes, but i did get to put on a blonde show of my own.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

you're terrible muriel!

Mark Weaver said...

I'm sure you put on a much better show than whatsherface.

Anonymous said...

I might not be a bombshell, but I am blonde, and I can carry a tune -eheh. We'd top JS and Ken any day of the week.

Unknown said...

Pat, It's great to see that you're getting in the practice for your future relations with the papparazi. You'll definitely have plenty of ammo to hand them.

Anonymous said...

Keep this up, bud, and you'll be front-page tabloid fodder before you know it! I'm proud of you, Pat. I always knew you had it in you.