this is just thread-tastic

my friend just informed me that there has been discussion about me on the pcc board recently. actually, the action has been more than just words. apparently, stalwart board veteran ryan debarr was the culprit that got this little butt in the limelight of the administration's ever watchful eye. to interpet myself: this guy thought it would be the right thing to do to report my online profile to the pcc administration. this came after days of talk and rumor about my profile by members of the pcc board.

i'm glad that there were some kind souls watching out for me. i certainly didn't have time for any of that myself, as i was preparing my senior graphic design show as a prerequisite for my graduation in may.

funny thing is, dean maclaughlin commented to me that the administration had merely "stumbled" across my profile. of course i knew that was a lie, but now i know the truth.

despite the fact that i had been kicked out, i could still carry out my plan to wish my friend annie a very happy 21st birthday. at least now i wouldn't be fearful of getting a lot of demerits... and maybe i could hype it a bit more. the school couldn't do anything to me except give me a littering fine. i can deal with that. except...the citation was actually for trespassing. understandable, i suppose. most pcc-ers take note of the threatening way former students are treated after they have been given the boot. it would have been nice, however, for the deans to stop accosting my brother every time he went on campus to visit his friends during thanksgiving. don't worry, sean believes homosexuality is a sin too. he isn't trying to carry out the ill wishes of his evi older brother.

ps - please don't confuse this gay blog of mine as an attempt to solicit myself for sex...

memories

here's a piece of memorabilia for all you pcc-heads out there. this is the form one signs just before being shadowed. this is the one i signed. HEART this, birney:

.

pcc is SBD. yea!

getting a court summons for spreading pictures of my friend annie all over campus - definitely SHOULDNT BE DONE. but it was definitely done. the school called called big brother, the cops, on li'l ol' me. in fact, here is a copy of my citation number. i'm still wating to find out if i have to go to court.


but here's a hint for pensacola christian college: if you are going to kick out a student for being gay and later send out a cop after him... take the extra precaution to be sure the cop isn't gay. i'll tell you what: this officer lady got a fiery look behind her eyes when I told her i was kicked out becasue the school doesn't like fags. i know i would be scared of that butch cop coming after me. so watch out dean baer...

ok - so this is why the cop came after me, why i have a citation number, etc: i returned to campus after i had just been kicked out to wish my friend a happy birthday in an unusual way. but it ws a harmless prank... watch my tubecast below - here i am, preparing the flyers the night before my last pcc appearance. imagine all of these harmless papers scattered about the pcc campus as students made their way to chapel:



no annie, no caresse. i HEART you.

today i HEART:
youtube - for all of your web video publishing needs. i think i might get addicted...
alon's - my cappucino and pistachio croisssant this morning were perfect. atlanta's finest!
spiked egnog - my first holiday drink of the season was drunk today!
travelocity - i think i need a cheap ticket to chicago, this is always the first place to go.

today SBD:
wal-mart - as always
suburban atlanta - the only reason i went to gwinnett was to take my vespa in for a tune-up.

HEARTlanta

i HEART atlanta. hotlanta. o mylanta. we should all HEARTlanta.

maybe because there are a few hills to vespa over, or maybe because there isn't a ton of snow like there is in aspen right now. maybe becasue coldplay HEARTS atlanta; maybe because mark and jessie have sweet little digs only two blocks apart in midtown. maybe because i was stuck in the redneck riviera for a week after i was kicked out of pensacola christian college, and god knows the redneck riviera lives up to its name.

the moment i vespa'd over the last hill of i-85 into downtown atlanta, i felt this gasping, heaping sigh of freedom. it was the deep, heart-freeing relief that i had been waiting for ever since day 1 of pcc in september. and heaven forsake pcc - i definitely don't HEART the place. in fact, it is super SBD.

this weekend has been a welcome out of prison/happy christmas holiday time for patrick. here's why we HEART it:

i HEART henry, my little green vespa

i never know what is going to happen next. often, the thing that does happen appears to have dropped from the sky and grounded me into the pavement like that piano that drops on some guys head, falling from the fifth floor window. what i mean is this: in high school, i was tardy to school every day, even though i lived across the street. i expected that. the school secretary expected that. i knew i could count on myself being late, and the secretary would write me up, no questions asked. fine. what i didN'T expect was that my mom, the high school math teacher, would one day write me up for being out of dress code. This would catapult over the line of arbitrary integrity that had been drawn by the highschool, therefore suspending me from school so i could sit all day in the library and look through ancient pages of national geographic. that's what i never expected. and that, by far, was not the last time irony looked askance and shot me a grin.

try this: getting kicked out of college for stealing a plastic carrot from the cafeteria. well, the deans didn't kick me out, but they "grounded" me to the campus for a month, which to me is murder anyway, right? how about breaking my foot the night before i was going to run with the bulls in pamplona, spain? you may say it was providential, but i say better to glory in dying from the run than packing up the next on a train to Paris, only to climb the eiffel tower on crutches. on my return trip to europe, i decided to delay my flight out of new york for four or five days. of course, if you ask mark, he may tell you that our delay was because i couldn't find my passport when we were boarding the plane, and four eventful days were spent in search of another one. just this summer, on my quickest one night round-trip visit to denver from aspen, my car broke down in the middle of the three-hour drive and i was stranded in the middle-of-mountains-nowhere, trying to make my way to a desperate one-night stand.

like i said, i never know what stands imminently in my path, except it usually a lemon. i mean, a bad situation - not the actual fruit (although my track record does indicate that if it were the actual fruit, it would probably be promptly pilfered). so my point, as the old adage goes, is that i make lemonade.

when i found out that, not only had my car broken down, but the engine had blown out, i began scheming. here was my agenda:
• i need to go back to school in a month, and i need a vehicle at school
• i need to drive cross country, because i obviously need to see
friendsin new york, rhode island, maryland, virginia, tennessee,
and georgia
• i need a vehicle between now and the time i leave
• i have always wanted a vespa
• if i spend 5K, i can get a crappy car or the vespa i've always
wanted
• i'll get a vespa.



obviously, this satisfies all of the requirements, not to mention the fact that the insurance and gas are...well, practically non-existent. in a situation with a car that is suddenly worth nothing, no means of transportation, and probably a pouty face, i could have bout a '98 toyota camry and grumbled all the way down to florida. instead, i spearheaded my own cross-country vespa touring movement, and made myself a glass of sparking lemonade. ...er, something like that.

and that, that is the way i came to find, know, and HEART henry, my little green vespa.